Tips for Your Next Virtual Happy Hour or Party

(TNS)—We have all suddenly and somewhat unwillingly been ushered into the age of the social video call.

Yes, we’ve all been on a few video conferences for work here and there—a necessary evil of remote teams and global businesses. But this is the first time we’ve all found ourselves celebrating birthdays, baby showers, engagements and even weddings with our friends and family compacted into boxes on a screen. The ink was barely dry on the shutdown orders last month before people started organizing happy hours, game nights, book clubs, watch parties, brunches and other gatherings online.

The age of social distancing has proved to be remarkably social. But there’s a bit of a learning curve to using video conferencing, even if you’ve done it for work before. The etiquette and expectations are a little different when you’re just vibing with your friends— but they still exist.

There’s a lot of overlap between pro tips for using Zoom, Skype or Google Hangouts for work and with your friends.

If you’ve never joined or set up a video call before, our ultimate guide to hanging out with your friends online has instructions. Once you’re ready to attain the next level of video-conferencing capabilities, come back here.

Using your laptop is better than your phone. You’ll quickly discover that holding a phone up at face height for an extended period of time is no fun. The video and sound quality tend to be lower coming from your phone. Also, if you have your laptop set up on a table in front of you, it’s easier to eat and drink. It also makes it feel a little more natural if you need to get up—like you’re just pushing your chair back from the table at a dinner party instead of making everyone else stare at your ceiling as your phone sits face-up while you refill your drink.

With Zoom, gallery view is better than speaker video. With speaker video, the person who’s making the most noise is a big picture, while everyone else is in a little bar at the side or along the top. Speaker view makes sense when you’re watching a work presentation but feels less natural in a group setting. Sometimes, more than one person is talking, or some other noise prompts the camera to switch over, like sirens outside or a dog barking. Gallery view gives you the “Brady Bunch”-style grid where you’re all in the same sized window. To change which view you’re seeing, go to the top right of the screen and click “Gallery View.”

Muting yourself still applies. In a get-together with a couple of other friends, sure, leave yourself unmuted. But when five or more people are joining the video call, it’s polite to mute yourself when you aren’t speaking. Laptop and phone microphones pick up sound differently than our ears do. What sounds to you like the normal hustle and bustle of making dinner in the background while you listen to your friends talk might be a magnified banging and clashing to them.

To look your best, put your laptop on a stack of books and check your background before you go live. I covered this in my complete guide to working from home, but it all still applies here. Put your laptop on top of a stack of books so the camera is at about eye level while you’re sitting down. Otherwise, you risk incurring the dreaded down-facing double chin.

Your friends are going to care less about what your house looks like than your boss might, but it’s still good to tidy up before guests come over, even if they’re only in attendance virtually.

“In a sense we’ve all become set designers,” said Mark Marino, who says he’d used Zoom a handful of times before coronavirus but now uses it regularly in his job as a professor who teaches writing at USC.

Just double-check that people aren’t staring at a mountain of dirty laundry or empty cans before you click “join meeting.” An alternative: Queue up some good virtual backgrounds.

Be the host with the most.

If you’re hosting the meeting with Zoom, you’ll need to upgrade to a Pro account or have to restart the meeting every 40 minutes when the free version runs out. Google Hangouts and Skype don’t set time limits. Try to start your gatherings on time so people aren’t left hanging on the hold screen.

Also, if you’re setting it up, plan some games that take advantage of the technology instead of trying to work around it. For more on that, keep reading.
OK, we’re on the call. Now what?

Social events via video conference require a bit more planning and finesse than a casual hang.

Plan things to do other things than just talking.

In a normal party setting, you’d split off and have side conversations among a few people and migrate around to different groups. Here, you have to keep a conversation going among everyone at once. That’s challenging. If you’re hosting, it might be more helpful to set an agenda so people know what to expect: “We’ll chat from 6 to 6:30-ish, then I was thinking we could (play some games / do a scavenger hunt / watch the new season of “Nailed It!” on Netflix / work on our separate crafting projects simultaneously.)”

We have a ton of ideas for that in our ultimate online hangout guide. A few to get your started: Jackbox games, virtual card and board games on, or tabletop RPGs—either standbys like Dungeons and Dragons, or ones designed specifically to be played virtually, like the #ZoomJam games Mark Marino’s students have been challenged to make. Party classics like Charades, Pictionary and Bingo are easily transferable to a video call.

Another idea: Be apart, together.

Pull out your Nintendo Switches and play Animal Crossing (the ultimate game for this moment in history) at the same time. Do crafts or a DIY project. You don’t have to be actively engaging with one another the entire time to feel together. Jennifer Peepas, who writes the advice blog Captain Awkward, called it “parallel socializing.” She and her friends have logged onto Zoom to knit together.

Scavenger hunts can take advantage of your separate locations and be a fun opportunity to move around a bit. The host names an object and everyone else has a certain amount of time (say, 30 seconds) to find it in their own house. A coffee mug with writing on it. A twist tie. A sock in a color other than white. A roll of toilet paper. (Credit where credit is due: I first heard of this idea on Twitter and vowed to steal it. Mission accomplished.)

PowerPoint Parties take advantage of digital screen-sharing technology. Everyone prepares a short presentation on a topic they’re enthusiastic about, whether it’s sourdough discard recipes or obscure unsolved mysteries or reality TV contestants. Then you take turns sharing.

Know when to say goodnight.

You aren’t the only person who feels totally worn out by these. A video call requires you to be “on” and maintaining conversation and eye contact in a way you don’t have to if you’re all meeting up at a bar. Marino likened the psychic exhaustion to “encountering a dementor in Harry Potter”—it’s just a weird, soul-sucking experience. And the fact that you can see your own face all the time is frankly perturbing. Feel free to have a sticky note on hand to keep yourself out of your line of sight.

So don’t plan an all-nighter. The general rule of thumb is that the more people on the call, the shorter it should be. I have found that the one-hour-to-90-minute range tends to be the sweet spot for most online gatherings that involve more than one or two other people.

Excusing yourself from the call can be a little tricky. Most of the reasons we give to leave a social situation no longer apply. You don’t need to beat traffic. You don’t have to get home to let the dog out. You probably don’t have somewhere else you need to be (though more and more people are finding themselves double-booked for Zoom hangouts these days).

“Just say, ‘it’s time for me to take off,’ ‘time for me to go,’ that’s it,” said Lizzie Post, the president of the Emily Post Institute. She said to resist the urge to pretend you’re having technical difficulties or the WiFi is going out. Your friends will get it and probably be relieved to have an excuse to say, “You know, I’m gonna get going too.”

“Most people are going through waves of being in weird headspace of wanting to connect or not wanting to connect or needing to get things done,” Post said. “Have confidence saying things like, ‘Hey, guys, I’m gonna take off, it’s been really fun chatting with you all, see you soon.”

Peepas, the Captain Awkward advice writer, said if you don’t feel comfortable being that assertive, use some outside help: an oven timer.

“If you’re trying to keep in touch with people, you do want to talk to them but you know you don’t want to do it for an hour, set a timer in another room (for however long you’d like to talk), and then enjoy your call,” she said, “and when the oven timer goes off, just say, ‘Oh, that’s my timer! I’ll talk to you next week.'”

It creates an invisible external force that the person you’re talking to likely won’t question. Up to you whether you decide to put something delicious in the oven to bake first.

About the Author

Greg DiGiorgio is a highly reviewed Arlington MA Realtor who is a dedicated, passionate, and market-savvy professional who puts his clients’ satisfaction before all else. His attention to detail, superior people skills, broad knowledge of the real estate industry as a whole, and his pure determination to indulge his clients with first class service sets him apart. In addition to Greg being an Accredited Buyers Representative-ABR, he understands the power of creative, well-organized and highly effective marketing and offers customized marketing plans that maximize property exposure to the most qualified buyers. He has appeared several times on Fox 25 News where he was interviewed on current market trends and conditions. A real estate transaction is really about managing people, their desires and their finances. It is an intricate and consequential negotiation.

Greg understands that it is important to secure not only the most able buyer, but also to the one that is most likely to close the deal. When so much is at stake, Greg is the one you want to represent you. His fair yet aggressive negotiating style and protectiveness of his clients’ best interests and ultimately, their assets, has gained his respect with colleagues and clients alike.

Greg also knows that every transaction represents the most important purchase or sale a person can make, and he takes every precaution to ensure that communication is impeccable with all parties involved from beginning to end. Whether it’s patiently guiding first time buyers through this exciting process or following through with clients’ needs long after the transaction is over, Greg’s warm, caring yet efficient business style will turn you into a client for life.


Greg grew up in the Greater Boston area and has a deep appreciation for the North East way of life. He attended The University of Massachusetts at Dartmouth where he graduated with a Bachelor of Science degree in Marketing, with a concentration in Marketing Research. Greg’s professional background is rooted in the technology sales & marketing. As a result, he learned to adapt to many different people and situations quickly and competitively. The insight that he has gained from many years of involvement in bringing all components of a transaction together smoothly has granted him a unique perspective and approach to the real estate industry. His enthusiasm and tenacity has allowed him to emerge as one of Greater Boston’s finest Realtors, and one of the highest reviewed amongst Arlington MA Realtors!

My Goal

My goal is to provide the best experience possible to my clients while helping them achieve their real estate goals. My streamline systems and use of technology ensure a smooth ride along the way. Whether it’s a first-time buyer, a seller, or investor, I strive to gain lifelong clients and friends by providing them with a fun, relaxing, but yet educational experience throughout the entire process.

Objectives for my Buyer Clients

Counsel session to determine wants & needsSchedule times to view properties

Run comparable analysis report for subject property

Help negotiate terms of the offer

Provided options for home inspectors

Help negotiate & finalize terms of Purchase & Sale Agreement

Assist in finalizing finances with Mortgage Broker

Handle any other paperwork and/or tasks including meeting mortgage commitment deadlines to making sure the transaction closes on time.

I keep an open door policy with all my clients even after the sale should they have any questions, or need help with any of their real estate needs. The closing of a real estate transaction is not the end, but just the beginning of a relationship.

Objectives for my Seller Clients

Listen carefully to make sure your goals and objectives are clearly understood

Explain the home selling process thoroughly

Discuss agency relationship

Price your home accurately

Stage your home for sale

Plan & implement a proven & innovative marketing plan

Work diligently to sell your home quickly and efficiently

Follow up with open house leads & showing brokers to obtain feedback

Work hard to ensure that each step of the transaction is running smoothly

To ensure that all smoke & carbon monoxide detectors are installed and working correctly, and to obtain certificate from town/city

To obtain final payoff for city/town water bill

“Most Importantly to communicate with you consistently and efficiently throughout the entire home selling process”

Certifications and Recognitions

Winner of Leading Edge Real Estate’s Outstanding Creative Marketing Award. Certified Residential Specialist (CRS)

Accredited Buyers Representative (ABR)

Member of the Institute of Luxury Home Marketing (ILHM)

Licensed Massachusetts Real Estate Broker

Member of Greater Boston Real Estate Board (GBREB)

Member of National Association of REALTORS (NAR)

Zoning & Building Codes Certificate

Residential New Construction Certificate

Title V Certificate